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| I personally like the thick British Sweater look of her
ensemble here. Notice "Remember Our Vets" patch she's wearing. This is probably
exactly what the vets were picturing during those lonely nights in the foxhole.
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In the course of reading the paper, scanning for inane stories I can later spin at parties to either sound intelligent or witty, I often find myself in the land of the comics. This is magical land where careers that should have ended, AKA Charles Shultz of Peanuts defame, a long time ago live on in that eerie Dick-Clark-young forever kind of way. Garfield should have been "sent to the farm" a long time ago, but yet week after week, the cartoonist finds a new antidote about kicking a mentally challenged dog off the table. Sounds like a personal hell to me. |
Though most comics, and I use this word loosely because rarely do I find these comics comical, plug away at an obvious target audience( Love is.... for suburban moms one valium away from ending it all, Marmaduke: Those people who actually put sweaters on their dogs, Andy Capp: Those countless Americans who are British full monty slackers and eat hot fries), some reinvent themselves for the Nineties. Though I could never see Dagwood with a goatee and a "I'm DB Cooper" shirt, I'm sure his daughter, the fine piece of ass she is, has her clit-pierced. In Arlos and Andy, the father and son are having a heart to heart about indie rock music of all things, and it ends with Chip, the son saying, "Vinyl is cheaper, and it shows you’re independent and COOL!" I personally keep this one in my wallet. But the bravest departure from its roots has to be Nancy.
Besides being the ugliest kid ever born to the human species, she has also bored her audience to tears with chatter that would make Larry King sound like Chris Rock. Jesus, her hair dresser needs to be dragged out and shot. No, drawn and quartered. But the thing that is weirdest about this strip, save all the un-PC poor white trash jokes about Sluggo, is her Aunt is the most beautiful thing since Russ Meyer gave us the Faster Pussy Cat Kill Kill Kill chica trio. |
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| I like this brave departure from the normal suburban Apple pie motif
they usually try and cram down your throat in this strip. Though Norman Rockwell never
painted "Bubba putting Car on Cinder Block", this flash back of a 50s pin up girl with Daisy Duke action
transcends even David Foster Wallace's post-modern expectations. Basically, Bo, Luke, wouldn't you like to stick your General in her Lee? |
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| Heh, I really don't have to do to much to make this funny. I mean, heh, come on( pun intended). You'd think a woman like this wouldn't
need batteries anytime, anywhere. I got a theory though; if I was that beautiful of a woman but had to drag around an ugly ass kid like Nancy, I don't think any guys would come near me either.
I mean, it's not that far of jump to see Nancy's hair and the horrid snatch monster you might encounter. Plus, DAMN NANCY IS UGLY. Okay, just in case you missed it,
that Nancy kid makes Janet Reno look like Kate Moss. |
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I'm serious, how could these two people possible be related. Are comic genetics different from that of those of Mendal? Can it possible be that when comic book characters do the deed, the process of generating a new story line for a dying strip has no bearing on their genes?
I researched other strips and the results were astounding. From Alley Oop to Zoro, the bases for looks between comic parent to comic child seemed random at best. Marvin resembles their postman more than his dad, but his mom seems so pure. But who knows what goes on when the paper is folded and the lights go down on the strips. I couldn't find a single grown up in Peanuts, which for the first time seemed a little odd. The only closely matching parental-to-child unit was A Rose is Rose, but this comic is so lame I could barely make it through the four panels to verify the fact. |
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| Boy howdy, look at that. Okay, first I have to admit I made one enhancement, much to some people's dismay. Though one might say that I personaly
envisioned her breast to be to large and oatmeal cookie-like, I say those people are wrong and short sighted. I thought about adding a belly button ring but decided against it. The other great
part of this picture, besides her easy access sweatpants, is the look of general fright and apprehension on Nancy's face. What the hell is going on at that school? Death Match Dodge Ball? Answer or Die Spelling Bees? Submission Math? Whatever it is, Nancy wants no part of it. Maybe tomorrow is the day Sluggo wants to meet her at recess for their own special game behind the gym. |
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| Speaking of talking pigs, Nancy shut up, I'm trying to size up your Aunt in her Jackie O outfit. I wonder if that jacket is leather? My other favorite of this pic is the screen time Sluggo gets. The look of astonishment means 1) They can afford 11 bucks a piece for the movie( remember Sluggo's the original Kenny, poor white-trash) 2) Nancy looks even more unappealing than usual in that gay ass letterman jacket 3) He has just been seen in public with Nancy. I like how the Aunt looks like she is in a huge rush. I bet it's to lock Nancy back up in the attic and refuse to admit such an ugly animal could be born to man. |
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Basically I realized Nancy's aunt was never suppose to look like her for one reason and one reason only. Sex sells, and I bought. I now regularly read Nancy just to see what her aunt might be up to. Plus, if her main target audience is the people who read her in the Fifties, then of course she's suppose to look like that for the old man who is supposedly chuckling at Nancy's antic, but in actuality is ogling Fritz's breast.
Nancy, you are one ugly bastard, but your aunt can come tickle my funny bone any time.
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Last, but definitely not least, is this one strip. I took out words so you can add your own. I suggest drinking before doing so, because then the dog part just gets funnier by the minute.
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